THINGS I'VE PUT INTO ADS

A man with the bum on Kim Kardashian, strutting in high heel shoes.

A 15ft African Elephant walking through NYC.

A woman being elbowed in the face.

A ferret writing a suicide note.

Diego Maradona being shot dead.

Santa Claus naked.

A man pulling off his skin to reveal that he’s an ostrich.

A sausage cannon.

Kuala Lumpur wrapped in brown paper.

A New Jersey gangster panda.

A golden pipe.

A dog riding a skateboard.

A man having his hand cut off.

Excrement.

A bionic hedgehog.

A bite being taken out of a live lamb.

An inflatable sex doll.

A chocolate bar exploding in a microwave.

A fourteen ounce piece of lamb.

A biscuit with a saw poking out of it.

A hairy woman.

A club night in a toilet.

A pigeon shitting on the head of a Frenchman.

Wife swapping.

A stuffed adult boar head.

Didier Drogba pulling on a condom.

Various midgets.

A 34” ash finish baseball bat.

Swine Flu.

A flock of geese flying into a jet engine.

Premiership footballers dancing like mosquitos.

Sawn off steel pipe.

A used noose.

Swingers.

A man who can’t stop crying.

A dog with its hair dyed pink.

Two grown men riding a children's 50p-a-go toy train.

A man in bed with a moose.

A mule on a red carpet.

A military goat.

A condiment gun.

A guy with scars in the shape of jazz instruments.

Upcoming

A cat riding a space craft.

Removing a bicycle from a bear.

A woman screaming ‘Sellotape’.